I am learning that integrity is much broader than just doing
the right thing in matters of ethics or making sure not to lie or cheat. True integrity is about doing the right thing
even if it is uncomfortable, even if it costs you something, even if it hurts. True integrity is a commitment to do what is
right or needed even if you don’t feel like it.
I understand this principle in areas like becoming a better
leader. For instance, I try to have the
hard conversations first and not put off things that need to be dealt with. Putting them off may be most comfortable in
the short term, but in the long term they only snowball to bigger and bigger
problems. This is true in relationships
and it’s true in any of those sometimes menial tasks that we all tend to want
to put off.
Applying these principles to my personal life has taken much
more time and energy. For instance, I
have decided that the best time for me to exercise is in the morning, it’s the
only consistent time in my day. Doing
the right thing no matter what means getting up at 5:30- no matter how I am
feeling. It’s putting on those shoes and
getting into my car to get to the gym bright and early. It has been surprising to discover that my
feelings actually matter very little.
When I make it about doing the right thing then the decision becomes
easy.
This does not mean that I ignore my feelings when I am sick
or injured, then the right thing is to rest and recuperate. It is normal that most of the time I will not
feel like doing the right thing. I try
not to let that fact alarm me. Doing
what is right is often costly, even unpopular.
I have let my feelings drive me and determine how I chose to live my
life far too often.
I always feel better at 7 am knowing that I did what I have committed
to do. There is a kind of internal
consistency to this type of living that has brought a lot more peace into my
life. It is almost like I am able to
trust myself in ways that I never had before.
I notice that I am able to accomplish more and able to handle stressful
situations with less anxiety. I have
proven to myself that I can and will follow through. Besides, on days I go to the gym, the hardest
part of my day is already over! I
survived and conquered burpees! I did
push ups! I ran and walked until I was
out of breath. Nobody will throw
anything at me that difficult for the rest of my day! You got problems you need me to handle? You got paperwork that needs to be done? It’s okay!
The most challenging part of my day has already been conquered. And even if I did not perform as I would have
liked I still made it out there.
Sometimes just showing up isn’t just half the battle- it is the battle and if you did that then
you’ve made it!
Yay! So glad you wrote this. Been thinking about our convo regarding internal integrity a lot this past week.
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